This Halloween Season, Cuffing’s Out, Ghosting’s In
MALAYA NORDYKE // NOVEMBER 9, 2018
You’ve heard of cuffing season. Now meet ghosting season.
Some hopeless romantics may falsely identify post fall break as cuffing season. The leaves are turning, temperature is falling and everyone is just looking for a special someone to cuddle up with. Right? Wrong.
Hot take alert: It’s not cuffing season, it’s ghosting season. Halloweek is the spookiest week of the year. Oberlin is crawling with ghouls, gremlins, and, worst of all, ghosts. The ghosts come out of hiding after a week of being away— you’d be surprised what getting out of the Oberlin bubble can do to a person.
For some, break means the resurfacing of family issues, so ghosts are lugging extra emotional baggage onto their shuttle home bus. For others, break means reviving old feelings for a former fling, leaving one confused about their relationship with their Oberlin bae. Some Obies encounter neither of these things but still come back with a lingering urge to switch things up for the second module. This, coupled with bad communicative skills and unconcern for one’s feelings leads to a ~ghost~. Whatever the case may be, the months from October to December yield some pretty spooky ghost stories.
Ghosting literally means to disappear from someone’s life -- but what does that look like at Oberlin, given that the ghost is constantly in a one mile radius of their ghostee? “I don’t think ghosting is possible here” says an off-the-record Oberlin fourth year. Ghosting as it is practiced in the real world might not be possible because of closeness in proximity, but Oberlin ghosts get creative. To help you identify just what kind of poltergeist is refusing to hit you back up, here are the three different kinds of ghosting that’ll go down this Halloween season.
Soft ghosting: The soft ghoster really just lets things fizzle. While they don’t stop replying, they definitely let their ghostee know they’re not interested, without actually telling them straight up. These soft ghosts have curt, dismissive, and/or passive responses. Soft ghosts will occasionally like their ghostee’s Instagram selfies just to keep them on their toes. They’ll engage in brief, uncomfortable conversations with their ghostee at parties but act like nothing ever happened. For some, this is the most agreeable type of ghost, but unlike most real-life spirits, this one is not transparent. As the easiest variety to pull off, soft ghosting will probably be the type you encounter most on this list, but that doesn’t always mean the disappearance won’t sting. My advice? Get yourself back on Tinder and find another turkey you can drop the weekend after Thanksgiving.
Ghosting: The regular ghost stops responding to texts/calls and will never follow up on plans. But they’ll give their ghostee an awkward wave every now and then. For that reason, this type of Oberlin Ghost is maybe the most uncomfortable on the list. How do you know whether to expect the kind of Splitchers where you smile at each other or the kind where you dance 6 feet apart with your backs to each other and tell your friends to stop looking? Of course, just to make things a little easier for the both of you, regular ghosters avoid any verbal exchange at all costs.
Hard ghosting: Hard ghosting is possibly most similar to real-world ghosting. Hard Oberlin ghosting goes above and beyond not responding to texts and/or phone calls. Because Oberlin ghosts can’t really disappear, they do the next best thing: completely ignore. These kinds of ghosts won’t even make eye-contact passing their ghostee in Decafé. They’ll look straight on as their ghostee offers a friendly wave. Rough.
If you find yourself being ghosted, feel free to send the perpetrator a couple of ghost emojis, just to let them know you’re on to them. For those who will become ghosts this season (RIP), remember that ghosting isn’t cool and consider leaving your ghostee a spooky sign to let them know you’ve passed on.