by Jason Hewitt
[originally published 10/11/19]
Going out in Oberlin can be a huge challenge sometimes. There are so many factors that go into how the night could turn out. The night might be one of the most exciting times you’ll ever have at Oberlin, or it might end up with you going home looking salty because the functions just… weren’t it. A lot of us have experienced both, and personally, I experience the latter a LOT more than the former here at Oberlin.
So, I’m going to talk about the pros and cons of going out here, because it’s a topic that’s discussed a bit on campus, but it hasn’t really been covered by The Grape… until now…
Going out can be one really fun time. It’s a great opportunity to kick back and have fun with some of your closest friends here. I mean, why wouldn’t you want to hang out with the homies on a Friday or Saturday night? Also, we have Splitchers on Wednesdays! Sometimes, the music at the functions is actually lit. That’s the beauty of going to a music school. Everyone’s taste in music is seemingly higher at Oberlin, so there’s a good chance that the tunes are banging. Sometimes you just need to dance out the stresses of the week on a crammed stage filled with drunk first years.
Another dope thing about going out is when you randomly run into people and end up going on a spontaneous adventure with them for that night. You may run into a friend group that you haven’t really been able to hang out with for a while. Those are always the best experiences, especially if the functions you end up going to end up being a solid time.
And then, of course… seeing that special “someone.” Ahhh, yes, the hookups. If going to a party here ends up being more of a snooze fest, at least there’s an opportunity to be intimate with someone attractive for the night. It’s college, after all, and everyone’s hormones are all over the place. Plus, we are STRESSING out here! Stress relief is important, so hey, do what you have to do! *wink, wink*
So, you could go through all the trouble of going to a lame party or you could just stay home and catch up on some of your favorite shows. Besides, parties at Oberlin are unbearably predictable. They usually get shut down by S&S by the time they are actually (somewhat) lit. Boom, there’s that. What else could go wrong about going out? Well, as a senior, I’ve been here long enough to witness and experience some really bad nights here. You could end up getting too drunk and start puking at the party your crush is at. There might be someone you can’t stand at the function you’re going to, and that “someone” ends up ruining your night with their presence. That has definitely happened many times here. Now that winter is coming around we’ll all have to deal with the dreaded fiasco of trying to find your coat in a dark house. Not to mention that walking to a mediocre house party in the snow isn’t always worth it.
When it comes to Splitchers, you have to consider a few things. First of all, it’s on a Wednesday night, which means that there is a good chance that you have class the following day. Is it really worth the extra stress to go to Splitchers, an event that isn’t always a banger? What if you went there and it ended up being boring? You would probably be salty about going out in the first place when you could have relaxed in bed or got ahead in work. There’s also another important factor that hasn’t really been considered yet: music. What if you hate country music and the Splitchers theme is country related? Maybe you might not know what the theme is and you pull up to… country music. That would be an instant turn off to me. (No disrespect to country music, by the way… “Free Bird” by Lynyrd Skynyrd is one of my favorite songs!) There are many negatives to going out that match the positives.
Going out in Oberlin can be a hit or miss move. My advice? Hit up your friends first. See what’s going on that night and try to link up with your friends to pregame together first. That way, you all can enjoy that night around people you enjoy, no matter how boring the later function is. Stay lit and stay safe, Obieland!