The Season of Love

Oberlin Couples Celebrate V-Day

By Malaya Nordyke | mnordyke@oberlin.edu | February 23, 2018 @ 6:12 pm

The jury is still out on whether February is cuffing or de-cuffing season, but there is no denying that love is in the air, or at the very least shoved in our faces, on the fateful day of February 14th. So, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, I’ve decided to examine the Oberlin dating season through the different types of couples found on campus.

The "Healthy and Chill"

The healthy and chill relationship is described by sophomore Sadie Grant as “oddly comfortable.” Most Healthy and Chill relationships are merely a symptom of still being in the honeymoon period, but there is the occasional H&C relationship that has withstood the test of time.

What they did on Valentine’s Day: made dinner, went to Cleveland, double date

The "Long Distance"

Often short-lived, but when they last it’s pretty impressive. Whether they started dating in high school, met on a weekend trip to Wesleyan, or had a passionate fling while abroad in Prague, the long distance couple knows how to put in work to make it work, and we’re all cheering them on.

What they did on Valentine’s Day: Facetime sex, Facetime Domino’s date

The "They Still Go Here?"

Picture this: you are walking to your class in King and you see a person that you haven’t seen in a year. You probably thought that they either dropped out or graduated. Wrong! This person is in a TSGH relationship, which means they spend all their time couped up in a room with their significant other, only to emerge for food, bathroom, and (hopefully) class breaks.

What they did on Valentine’s Day: Stayed in their room? Watched a movie? Thought about the outside world? Who knows? Do they even go here?

The "It’s Complicated"

Pretty self explanatory, and very situational. It’s Complicated relationships are most often a symptom of bad communication and/or a messy history. It’s tricky, but there’s nothing wrong with that!

What they did on Valentine’s Day: …it’s complicated.

The "What are We?"

So you have been hooking up for a while but have yet to have the talk. Not knowing what is expected of you or what you can expect from your partner can be super stressful, especially during the season of love. The What Are We is a basic pre-req for almost every other relationship. (Not to be confused for the It’s Complicated – it’s only complicated because you need to DTR.)

What they did on Valentine’s Day: Made cards and stressed about whether or not to give them to each other.

 

The "Meant to be but not together"

As odd as this couple sounds, they’re not too uncommon at Oberlin. This couple generally has a deep connection but no matter how many “talks” they have had they are not officially together. Usually a product of a looming graduation date, inability to be in a relationship, or compulsive need to play it “chill,” this Oberlin couple has a confusing road ahead.

What they did on Valentine’s Day: Planned to go out to dinner…with their entire friend group.

The "freshman year fling that somehow hasn’t died yet"

 

When you first arrive at college it can feel like there is this pressure to find the one, or at least one of the ones. This, along with the loneliness of freshman year, makes one desperate to make a connection with someone, thus yielding multiple month-long relationships. These relationships could age two different ways: (1) you remain friends, or (2) it’s the hookup that haunts you for the next four years. Living in a one-mile radius from that person “makes Oberlin a minefield,” said a sophomore wishing to remain anonymous: “You can’t go anywhere without worrying you are going to see them.”

What they did on Valentine’s Day: wondered what the other did on Valentine’s day. Listened to the breakup album they wrote about you, just for old times sake.

The "couple that everyone thinks is a couple but is not a couple"

 

Can’t people just be friends? This “couple” is really just a set of friends that go to Mudd together, eat meals together, hang out, you know, normal friend things. Most commonly a symptom of first year never-wanting-to-go-anywhere-alone jitters. On this Valentine’s Day, let us remember that there are no relationships more important than with your platonic partners.

What they did on Valentine’s Day: nothing!! They are not a couple.

Not in a couple, just loving yourself

 

Okay, let’s be real, Oberlin can be an incredibly weird place to forge a relationship. Why? Who knows. But it’s totally cool if you are not with anyone or not interested in being with anyone. At this time in your life you should be focusing on yourself not looking for validation from someone else! So if you are alone this Valentine’s Day, don’t sweat it. After all, Valentine’s Day is just the effing hegemonic ideal of consumerism and America’s (successful) attempt at capitalizing on love, b*tch!

What they did on Valentine’s Day: loved 👏 thyself 👏

Contact contributing writer Malaya Nordyke at mnordyke@oberlin.edu.

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