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Straight, cis white guy super excited for Drag Ball this year

ANONYMOUS // APRIL 13, 2018

After telling everyone in his immediate vicinity that he was “so fucking stoked” for Drag Ball this year, second-year student Chad Smith (he/him) proceeded to ask his friends if any of them had a “molly plug”.

 

Later that afternoon, I had a chance to sit down with Chad in order to more fully understand his excitement for Drag Ball. When I asked him to tell me specifically why he was so excited for the event, traditionally a celebration of queer identity, Smith replied that, for him, it’s just about the opportunity to “get really fucking trashed and dress like a chick.” Expanding on this extremely nuanced perspective, Smith added that while he’s “definitely not gay,” him and his friend Brad made out at last year’s Drag Ball and they might do so again at this year’s event.

 

Noticing my raised eyebrows, Smith stated very definitively “seriously though, no homo,” and began sweating profusely. Without my asking, he went on tell me about how, even though he watches gay porn from time to time, it’s “not what it sounds like.”

 

At this point, I decided it was time to change the direction of this interview. I asked Smith about which of the workshops or events he planned to attend in order to be able to purchase a ticket to Drag Ball. After thinking about this for a few minutes, Smith responded with a “straight” face that he would try to attend something that doesn’t “make him feel guilty for having a lot of privilege”, adding that he’s “just a performative ally, you know?”

 

To the utter surprise of myself and the entire Grape staff, Smith reported that he is a Gender, Sexuality, and Feminist Studies major.